Saturday 29 December 2018
HER MISTRESS'S VOICE
I'd like to tell you a brief bit about my story, life with HMV.
I grew up in Melbourne around the corner from where they film Neighbours (no joke), so it was a bit of a suburby nothing for a young kid. I fell in love with British indie music by way of a very odd encounter featuring Alanis Morissette (don't ask, I was 15), and all I could do from that day on was aspire to be part of this amazing scene.
You may scoff, but for a kid growing up in a very dull soundscape, Britpop meant a lot to me. And then, one day, the shopping centre up the road got redeveloped and it had an HMV.
I immediately knew that I HAD to work there, to be a part of the people who could talk to me about the Stone Roses without thinking I'd said AC/DC. So I embarked upon a mission. Every day after school I would take my CV in (which at this illustrious stage included Target - Ladieswear).
The manager at the time tried to ban me, for pestering the staff. At the same time, I made friends, two of them still close, who worked there. One day, someone quit, the manager (result!) and they sighed and went, "ok, lets see what you've got".
It's not glamourous. It involves heaps of stickers, and ordering and doing your stock control. The best part? Helping people who want to talk about music. I thought I was on my own with that. In terms of Shed Seven, many would wrongly say I still am.
I then bothered another indie store, which was as indie as you can get - one guy. Same tactic. Constant CVs and talking about music. I loved that place too. Paul thought my ordering of records was so good he gave me an engraved pen when I decided to up sticks.
Obviously as some point, I was going to have to move to London, and looking for a Christmas job, so broke I was living on bagels (25p and fill you up), I immediately walked into the biggest HMV in the country. And bumped into my boss from the suburbs back in Melbourne. He loves Kylie. I got a job.
I spent the greatest year of my life working on that shop floor. The friendships we made over music have now become friendships we have kept for the rest of our lives. I've been to their weddings. They've been to mine. We've gone through all of this together.
And after you make a bond over music, it doesn't leave you. My mates from there still give me shit about my "apparently" poor taste in music, but you can spend hours in others companies talking about stuff like this. And it bonds. I yearn for 2005 every, fucking, day.
A number of my dear friends and partner still work for the company. We are all in bits about that news, so we must remember 2005, guys. Let's remember no matter what happens, it was music that brought us together, and we will stick like glue. And be there for one another.
I love you all my HMV friends. Very, very much.
Courtney Hodgkiss
PS Also - Hoggboy and Mensw@r were VERY UNDERRATED.
Tuesday 23 October 2018
MAKING A MURDERER: PT 2.
Yes, if the headline didn't give it away, there may be spoilers. But hopefully just pithy realisms.
I've just watched the first two eps of the second series of MaM. And my brain, outlook, whatever, has changed considerably since I watched the first series.
I ate it up with a spoon. Spent a lot of time in front of the telly with my long-suffering husband screaming about the way the American "judicial" system is completely corrupt, biased, etc. Please make note, law people - these are only my opinions. I pull the First Amendment.
Oh yeah. I'm American by birth. WHOOPS. Considering what is being demonstrated by the FPOTUS (you can work out what the F stands for and it's not a swear), I can say whatever I like without fear of litigation. Within reason.
I'm feeling very uncomfortable watching this new series. Maybe it's because FPOTUS has been in power(ish) for two years now. Maybe it's because I've had to watch some jerk like Kavanaugh be elected to the highest court of the US land after behaving like a child, up against a woman who told the truth, and for no personal gain. Dr BF still can't go home because idiots are sending her death threats. Totally, completely not covered by the First Amendment. Cowards.
But it seems like we are making a hero out of a couple of dudes, who yes, look like they were right stitched up. It's fairly clear, and that's why this series was so popular in the first place. But a woman DIED. And instead of the program focusing on who actually made that happen, we are focusing on the dudes.
And my heart breaks for Dassey, when I see that video evidence. He's totally being led, we all know that. My instincts would say Avery has probably pissed off the wrong people. But that's not my point.
No one is a winner here, and I think there is a real lack of attention brought to Halbach's family. Maybe it comes in the later episodes, but what I've seen out of the first few is they've completely refused to talk to the documentary makers.
Which brings me to my final point. I don't know if it's relevant. Maybe it is, everyone has their own opinion (First Amendment, right?). And they (the two doc makers) were speakers at a conference I went to a couple of years back, just as the doc was going nuts all around the world. I was jumping up and down to see them, and ran to the best seat I could get after the break to see my journalistic heroines.
And? They were the two most closed, boring interviewees I've ever seen. They were meant to be talking about inspiring us, and basically took no questions, and by the end of the fairly short segment, they were ushered off, and I was asleep. They were so closed about the next process of this work I thought - you've been told to not say anything. Because you're in a contract and doing another one.
So what happens if that is the case? Journalism begins to merge into entertainment, bowing to production companies and the usual story. I'm not saying that necessarily happened. As I pointed out, it may be my opinion based through my own, biased, view. But I'm not saying it didn't. I'm posing a question. Which is what doc journalism is meant to do. This show has no questions except how the prosecution got away with it.
Balanced, clear views is what we need in this era of big fat cats deciding how we live on the roll of a McHappy Meal toy.
PS. The keynote speaker at that conference to inspire was Harvey Weinstein.
I've just watched the first two eps of the second series of MaM. And my brain, outlook, whatever, has changed considerably since I watched the first series.
I ate it up with a spoon. Spent a lot of time in front of the telly with my long-suffering husband screaming about the way the American "judicial" system is completely corrupt, biased, etc. Please make note, law people - these are only my opinions. I pull the First Amendment.
Oh yeah. I'm American by birth. WHOOPS. Considering what is being demonstrated by the FPOTUS (you can work out what the F stands for and it's not a swear), I can say whatever I like without fear of litigation. Within reason.
I'm feeling very uncomfortable watching this new series. Maybe it's because FPOTUS has been in power(ish) for two years now. Maybe it's because I've had to watch some jerk like Kavanaugh be elected to the highest court of the US land after behaving like a child, up against a woman who told the truth, and for no personal gain. Dr BF still can't go home because idiots are sending her death threats. Totally, completely not covered by the First Amendment. Cowards.
But it seems like we are making a hero out of a couple of dudes, who yes, look like they were right stitched up. It's fairly clear, and that's why this series was so popular in the first place. But a woman DIED. And instead of the program focusing on who actually made that happen, we are focusing on the dudes.
And my heart breaks for Dassey, when I see that video evidence. He's totally being led, we all know that. My instincts would say Avery has probably pissed off the wrong people. But that's not my point.
No one is a winner here, and I think there is a real lack of attention brought to Halbach's family. Maybe it comes in the later episodes, but what I've seen out of the first few is they've completely refused to talk to the documentary makers.
Which brings me to my final point. I don't know if it's relevant. Maybe it is, everyone has their own opinion (First Amendment, right?). And they (the two doc makers) were speakers at a conference I went to a couple of years back, just as the doc was going nuts all around the world. I was jumping up and down to see them, and ran to the best seat I could get after the break to see my journalistic heroines.
And? They were the two most closed, boring interviewees I've ever seen. They were meant to be talking about inspiring us, and basically took no questions, and by the end of the fairly short segment, they were ushered off, and I was asleep. They were so closed about the next process of this work I thought - you've been told to not say anything. Because you're in a contract and doing another one.
So what happens if that is the case? Journalism begins to merge into entertainment, bowing to production companies and the usual story. I'm not saying that necessarily happened. As I pointed out, it may be my opinion based through my own, biased, view. But I'm not saying it didn't. I'm posing a question. Which is what doc journalism is meant to do. This show has no questions except how the prosecution got away with it.
Balanced, clear views is what we need in this era of big fat cats deciding how we live on the roll of a McHappy Meal toy.
PS. The keynote speaker at that conference to inspire was Harvey Weinstein.
Friday 14 September 2018
NEVERTHELESS, SHE PERSISTED.
Hey. So my fingers don't work so great and this is already taking me far too long at this late time.
However.
I will not be told by anyone. Family, friend, or foe. that I am not good enough. I am doing a great job here. I will not be told by anyone - friend, family, or foe; who gets to tell me what I am. I can tell you who I am right now, and I shall.
It has taken some months to be able to do this, and bring the energy/ courage to do it. But I feel no shame.
I have achieved some amazing things since my illness and disability occurred. And the amount of time I am taking having to take writing this, and correcting this, is part of my character. I am determined.
I know I have written a lot of Trumpy bloke. That was a journalistic exercise that failed.
Much like the rest of my endeavours it would appear.
Well, no matter. I know who and not to trust any more, and I wish them all the best.
We don't give up. Oh God there is folk music on talk radio. This may actually break me.
Don't discount the quieter part,. Everyone deserves a voice.
However.
I will not be told by anyone. Family, friend, or foe. that I am not good enough. I am doing a great job here. I will not be told by anyone - friend, family, or foe; who gets to tell me what I am. I can tell you who I am right now, and I shall.
It has taken some months to be able to do this, and bring the energy/ courage to do it. But I feel no shame.
I have achieved some amazing things since my illness and disability occurred. And the amount of time I am taking having to take writing this, and correcting this, is part of my character. I am determined.
I know I have written a lot of Trumpy bloke. That was a journalistic exercise that failed.
Much like the rest of my endeavours it would appear.
Well, no matter. I know who and not to trust any more, and I wish them all the best.
We don't give up. Oh God there is folk music on talk radio. This may actually break me.
Don't discount the quieter part,. Everyone deserves a voice.
Tuesday 17 July 2018
DAY SEVENTEEN MILLION: "WE NEED SOME CLARIFICATION"
I could not agree more, Trumpy. However, after the last two days of, to quote my hero Jon Stewart (you wouldn't like him), this utter CLUSTERFUCK you've made of this trip, tonight's presser did not really enlighten, me, CNN correspondents, BBC correspondents, or the general public.
Let's take a moment to review what was said. All quotes directly attributed to Donald Trump, as broadcast by every major news network in the western world. (Oh, hang on. Are we ALL Fake News?)
We started the diatribe with a clearly off-message self-congratulatory pat on the back about his amazing work with getting more money out of NATO. NOT THE BRIEF.
Then went on to call our Queen "a terrific person" who he "walked with" at Windsor. You didn't. You broke Royal protocol and walked ahead of her until she pulled you back. FAKE NEWS.
And then we get to why we are here.
"(The) most successful visit...was Russia."
On to the prepared speech, as I can imagine Huckabee Sanders was shooting absolute side eye by this point.
"(I have) full faith in (the US) intelligence agencies...I accept (Russia meddled in our election process)."
"(We have) a need for some clarification".
This is my personal fave:
"I said the word 'would' instead of 'wouldn't'". Um. Huh?
We then move into the free text part of the speech where the usual rhetoric is trotted out; Obama, Hillary, oh did you know he won 2016?
I'm not even going to address what he is quoted as saying about discussing Syria. If you did, show strength, and mention it at the time. You didn't.
Oh yeah, no collusion, a number of times as well. Hand-written in Sharpie on your notes. We've picked up that's what you think. About two years ago.
Today, unfortunately for you, you've made this worse for yourself. You have come across as a weak leader, who doesn't understand years of international policy that has come before you, and have tried to reduce your entire term of office to a reality television show.
What do we expect to come from this? Well, as we are completely through the looking glass now, probably nothing. The man is Teflon. I've never seen anything like this in my many years of life. It doesn't make it right, but it is certainly indicative of the fact that certain groups of people are being fed by the celebrity status he asserts onto the average person. Those average people, in middle America - and other parts - are just those people he directly targeted during his election run.
Let me make a cry in the dark to you. Please. Please, look at the facts as they present themselves. It is not a crime to support Trump. What does let you down, though, is using your right to vote and wasting it based on an ill-informed opinion.
You have a chance to make a stand in the next few months. Register to vote and make your voice heard. Whichever way it goes. So long as it's informed and something you can live with if this all starts going horribly wrong.
Let's take a moment to review what was said. All quotes directly attributed to Donald Trump, as broadcast by every major news network in the western world. (Oh, hang on. Are we ALL Fake News?)
We started the diatribe with a clearly off-message self-congratulatory pat on the back about his amazing work with getting more money out of NATO. NOT THE BRIEF.
Then went on to call our Queen "a terrific person" who he "walked with" at Windsor. You didn't. You broke Royal protocol and walked ahead of her until she pulled you back. FAKE NEWS.
And then we get to why we are here.
"(The) most successful visit...was Russia."
On to the prepared speech, as I can imagine Huckabee Sanders was shooting absolute side eye by this point.
"(I have) full faith in (the US) intelligence agencies...I accept (Russia meddled in our election process)."
"(We have) a need for some clarification".
This is my personal fave:
"I said the word 'would' instead of 'wouldn't'". Um. Huh?
We then move into the free text part of the speech where the usual rhetoric is trotted out; Obama, Hillary, oh did you know he won 2016?
I'm not even going to address what he is quoted as saying about discussing Syria. If you did, show strength, and mention it at the time. You didn't.
Oh yeah, no collusion, a number of times as well. Hand-written in Sharpie on your notes. We've picked up that's what you think. About two years ago.
Today, unfortunately for you, you've made this worse for yourself. You have come across as a weak leader, who doesn't understand years of international policy that has come before you, and have tried to reduce your entire term of office to a reality television show.
What do we expect to come from this? Well, as we are completely through the looking glass now, probably nothing. The man is Teflon. I've never seen anything like this in my many years of life. It doesn't make it right, but it is certainly indicative of the fact that certain groups of people are being fed by the celebrity status he asserts onto the average person. Those average people, in middle America - and other parts - are just those people he directly targeted during his election run.
Let me make a cry in the dark to you. Please. Please, look at the facts as they present themselves. It is not a crime to support Trump. What does let you down, though, is using your right to vote and wasting it based on an ill-informed opinion.
You have a chance to make a stand in the next few months. Register to vote and make your voice heard. Whichever way it goes. So long as it's informed and something you can live with if this all starts going horribly wrong.
Saturday 14 July 2018
STILL DAY SIX. I AM RETIRING FOR ONE DAY BECAUSE A SICK PERSON CAN NOT DO THIS ALL THE TIME.
Proof.
You win, Trump. I look worse than ever but that is down to my journalistic capabilities. You see I'm writing this at 11pm? Fuck me, that's nothing.
I'm having a WELL DESERVED DAY OFF tomorrow. I am going to be all over your arse on Monday with Putin, my friend.
Let me sleep now. You absolute disgrace to the Presidency of the US.
PS Let Eric out of the cage. Some sunlight might do him some good. YES I WENT THERE.
You win, Trump. I look worse than ever but that is down to my journalistic capabilities. You see I'm writing this at 11pm? Fuck me, that's nothing.
I'm having a WELL DESERVED DAY OFF tomorrow. I am going to be all over your arse on Monday with Putin, my friend.
Let me sleep now. You absolute disgrace to the Presidency of the US.
PS Let Eric out of the cage. Some sunlight might do him some good. YES I WENT THERE.
DEAR GOD, IT IS DAY SIX AND SOMEONE KILL ME NOW
Ideally, I wanted to post a couple of pictures of kids, who spoke eloquently in Scotland today about their dislike for the POTUS. My husband I and I broke into spontaneous applause after the first kid said his bit. SO beyond his years, and clearly not coached. The second one was on the picket line (as was the first, to be fair) on the beach at Aberdeen right by the police cordon. The second the second kid saw you know who, he started playing the bagpipes at top volume. I SALUTE YOU BOTH, SIRS.
Not that one above. I'm not posting pictures of innocent kids on a social media site. I have something called morals.
I've written down a load of quotes and accreditations I could use tonight. I don't feel like it. This week has bloody broken me into a tiny shell of a human. I don't fancy doing a heavy piece tonight, as I think we've had enough of that over the last few days. We have less that 24 hours before he goes to Helsinki and destroys us all further with his absolute, obvious dedication to Putin. Look, I don't know if that stupid sex tape thing is just a vile rumour, but I can tell you this one thing. Sit on your hands about this one, peeps.
Special Counsel Bob Mueller indicted - INDICTED - 12 Russian intel officers for interfering in the Clinton campaign. Trump knew about this happening earlier this week. Not complicit? Okay.
Here's my source. TOTES FAKE, right?
I've mentioned this before, POTUS, but quite frankly as an American born citizen you will have to find some bloody good dirt on me to shut me up. And THERE AIN'T. Please just go away and stop upsetting everyone.
Everything I have said today has a source. It's not Fake News. It's, you know, news. Oh, here's some accreditation for your interest. It's from your favourite news source, Fox News.
Enjoy.
Not that one above. I'm not posting pictures of innocent kids on a social media site. I have something called morals.
I've written down a load of quotes and accreditations I could use tonight. I don't feel like it. This week has bloody broken me into a tiny shell of a human. I don't fancy doing a heavy piece tonight, as I think we've had enough of that over the last few days. We have less that 24 hours before he goes to Helsinki and destroys us all further with his absolute, obvious dedication to Putin. Look, I don't know if that stupid sex tape thing is just a vile rumour, but I can tell you this one thing. Sit on your hands about this one, peeps.
Special Counsel Bob Mueller indicted - INDICTED - 12 Russian intel officers for interfering in the Clinton campaign. Trump knew about this happening earlier this week. Not complicit? Okay.
Here's my source. TOTES FAKE, right?
Soz for the long link, but you know, I have little time left.
Everything I have said today has a source. It's not Fake News. It's, you know, news. Oh, here's some accreditation for your interest. It's from your favourite news source, Fox News.
Enjoy.
PS It will always end up in a heavy piece. We're up shit creek.
Friday 13 July 2018
TRUMP VISIT: DAY BARELY SIX
I really wanted to bat this one over to Scotland for the rest of the trip. I am having a difficult time, and this has been hard. But as husband reminded me, I committed to this and he's still in the UK for a couple of days. So...
I'll see you tomorrow.
I'll see you tomorrow.
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| copyright: The Daily Show |
TRUMP VISIT: DAY FIVE. JULY 13 - THE DAY OF RECKONING.
Dear lord, I am exhausted by this.
I am also elated. Elated, at the sight of all my fellow supporters of rights for women, LGBTQI+ rights, disability rights, and you know, just rights of normal people who don't deserve to have their children snatched from them when they are seeking asylum.
I don't wish to focus on what the orange faced buffoon did today. It's unimportant now. What is important is that we have a voice, and we weren't listened to by our Government. Key issue: one T. May.
Do not hold his hand because he's "scared of stairs". He's bloody not. He uses that tactic to subjugate you.
And you fell for it. Nicey nicey. Do you really think that he's going to give two shits in a Handmaid's angel wings if we end up in a war the US aren't involved in? Wake up, sister. You had the chance to pull a Hugh Grant today, and you let the sisterhood down.
Now let me tell you who FUCKING DIDN'T.
I am also elated. Elated, at the sight of all my fellow supporters of rights for women, LGBTQI+ rights, disability rights, and you know, just rights of normal people who don't deserve to have their children snatched from them when they are seeking asylum.
I don't wish to focus on what the orange faced buffoon did today. It's unimportant now. What is important is that we have a voice, and we weren't listened to by our Government. Key issue: one T. May.
Do not hold his hand because he's "scared of stairs". He's bloody not. He uses that tactic to subjugate you.
And you fell for it. Nicey nicey. Do you really think that he's going to give two shits in a Handmaid's angel wings if we end up in a war the US aren't involved in? Wake up, sister. You had the chance to pull a Hugh Grant today, and you let the sisterhood down.
Now let me tell you who FUCKING DIDN'T.
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| copyright Michelle Brook |
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| copyright Michelle Brook |
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| copyright Caroline Lee |
You know what? I am so FUCKING PROUD of everything you have all done today. When you feel like all is lost - when that stupid Sun "exclusive" shows up and demeans the UK and her PM, and she PANDERS to him, it's women like all the wonderful marchers today that make me feel a little bit of hope is left in the world.
Look, I could be totally wrong. But there have been zero news reports of any disruption, violence or general march scariness. I couldn't go, as, well, I can't stand up. And I was heartbroken. But I wore my "Make Donald Drumpf Again" hat all day and spent some time yelling at people who didn't even know what was going on. I shouldn't yell. But apparently you have to, sometimes, to just be heard.
I am not a man-hater. By ANY MEANS. I just choose to associate with any species of being that allow me to be myself, and whom do not put me down for being different, on any number of levels. This isn't a male vs female debate. It's a dictatorship over democracy debate. But I feel like I've been let down by the head of our country by what I feel was brushing over the subject completely because she - let's face it - looks like she's intimidated by him.
These women above? And me? We're not. Come meet me, Donny. Have a light chat. Make fun of my disability to my face. Then we will see who is wearing the pants in this relationship.
Also. Mate. Gotta give you a heads up, yeah? The total number of people who turned up to protest about you today was WAY more than your inauguration "crowd". Hashtag #soznotsoz.
(Ed: number is now called at 250,000 people. Also, I am the Ed.)
Please now just leave me in peace and allow me to regain some sanity. Although I suspect that will be a long time coming.
In closing, I would like to thank some key women in my life for representin' on my behalf today. Sophie, Michelle and Caroline - never let the fuckers get you down.
Love to all. Signing off.
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Thursday 12 July 2018
TRUMP VISIT: DAY FOUR
Sightings. SO MANY FUCKING SIGHTINGS.
May I start this piece, which will be more journalistic than usual, by leaving this here as a taster.
Childish Gambino - This is America
Now. I hope you've done your homework of listening. This is the shitfight we are currently in.
A light intro, before the HARD NEWS begins. This afternoon, Donald J. Trump and his complicit wife flew over my house. Without a word between us, husband and I threw ourselves onto the balcony and started yelling "WE DON'T WANT YOU HERE! GO HOME!". And I understood what it felt to be a Trump supporter. And it felt horrible. I feel he may have seen us sending the V signs as his flunkies then flew over our house for the following two hours. I'm not a terrorist, Donny. I'm an AMERICAN CITIZEN AND I CALL THE FIRST AMENDMENT ON YOUR ARSE.
Now. The news. God, this is actually destroying my soul.
CNN (Fake News, right?), published a poll today. OK, we all know polls are skewed. You can't interview every person with every single opinion in the country - and they certainly didn't interview me - but 44% of Americans have said Obama was the best President of their lifetime. Followed by Bill Clinton at 33%, and Reagan at 32%. Like, the actor with the monkey or something. Trump is screaming into oblivity with 19%.
"The polls love me, look at the polls" - Donald Trump, every rally he's ever attended.
There is unconscious bias in polls. For example, millennials will not have recognised Reagan as a President as they basically weren't alive. Obama was the focal point of their political life, and that's not their fault, but they certainly weren't around when Clinton was going through impeachment due to the Lewinsky scandal. One of the charges was, ironically, obstruction of justice. So, we must keep in mind that there are always subconscious biases that come through in these polls. If you would like to like to look at this poll in further detail, the link is NOT here, as it broke my blog. I shall post it on my Twitter.
Let's look at the facts as they stand, from sources, rather than my opinion.
Trump wants to build a new golf course in Aberdeenshire, which has been promised to build new homes and help the community. It would appear that is not the case.
The ITV program Tonight, interviewed a lot of people living there today. Some of them were in the process of writing "RESIST" in the sand, hoping the POTUS would see it in a fly past. Cllr Martin Ford of the area said, "Mr. Trump establishes an alternative set of facts by repetition."
Alex Salmond, former First Minister of Scotland, went on to say, "He regards himself as the greatest dealmaker of all time.".
And surprisingly, or perhaps not considering his animosity with Piers Morgan (we all know the story guys), Alan Sugar said, "He has to understand (The EU) is a bigger market than you...He doesn't think what's best for the rest of the world.".
And then Sean Spicer - you remember him? The Press Secretary for the White House that couldn't find matching shoes to wear during a press briefing - gave this missive regarding a book he has contributed to; "(He is) a unicorn, riding a unicorn, over a rainbow.". Well, that has certainly cleared things right up. (Source: The Guardian).
I think if you're even reading this, we are probably on the same page. I fully support any person's right to protest for or against, so long as it's not violent or short-sighted. Have the facts to hand before you make your decision. And also, if you want to call me FAKE NEWS, I would wear it as a badge of honour.
Your move, Drumpf.
May I start this piece, which will be more journalistic than usual, by leaving this here as a taster.
Childish Gambino - This is America
Now. I hope you've done your homework of listening. This is the shitfight we are currently in.
A light intro, before the HARD NEWS begins. This afternoon, Donald J. Trump and his complicit wife flew over my house. Without a word between us, husband and I threw ourselves onto the balcony and started yelling "WE DON'T WANT YOU HERE! GO HOME!". And I understood what it felt to be a Trump supporter. And it felt horrible. I feel he may have seen us sending the V signs as his flunkies then flew over our house for the following two hours. I'm not a terrorist, Donny. I'm an AMERICAN CITIZEN AND I CALL THE FIRST AMENDMENT ON YOUR ARSE.
Now. The news. God, this is actually destroying my soul.
CNN (Fake News, right?), published a poll today. OK, we all know polls are skewed. You can't interview every person with every single opinion in the country - and they certainly didn't interview me - but 44% of Americans have said Obama was the best President of their lifetime. Followed by Bill Clinton at 33%, and Reagan at 32%. Like, the actor with the monkey or something. Trump is screaming into oblivity with 19%.
"The polls love me, look at the polls" - Donald Trump, every rally he's ever attended.
There is unconscious bias in polls. For example, millennials will not have recognised Reagan as a President as they basically weren't alive. Obama was the focal point of their political life, and that's not their fault, but they certainly weren't around when Clinton was going through impeachment due to the Lewinsky scandal. One of the charges was, ironically, obstruction of justice. So, we must keep in mind that there are always subconscious biases that come through in these polls. If you would like to like to look at this poll in further detail, the link is NOT here, as it broke my blog. I shall post it on my Twitter.
Let's look at the facts as they stand, from sources, rather than my opinion.
Trump wants to build a new golf course in Aberdeenshire, which has been promised to build new homes and help the community. It would appear that is not the case.
The ITV program Tonight, interviewed a lot of people living there today. Some of them were in the process of writing "RESIST" in the sand, hoping the POTUS would see it in a fly past. Cllr Martin Ford of the area said, "Mr. Trump establishes an alternative set of facts by repetition."
Alex Salmond, former First Minister of Scotland, went on to say, "He regards himself as the greatest dealmaker of all time.".
And surprisingly, or perhaps not considering his animosity with Piers Morgan (we all know the story guys), Alan Sugar said, "He has to understand (The EU) is a bigger market than you...He doesn't think what's best for the rest of the world.".
And then Sean Spicer - you remember him? The Press Secretary for the White House that couldn't find matching shoes to wear during a press briefing - gave this missive regarding a book he has contributed to; "(He is) a unicorn, riding a unicorn, over a rainbow.". Well, that has certainly cleared things right up. (Source: The Guardian).
I think if you're even reading this, we are probably on the same page. I fully support any person's right to protest for or against, so long as it's not violent or short-sighted. Have the facts to hand before you make your decision. And also, if you want to call me FAKE NEWS, I would wear it as a badge of honour.
Your move, Drumpf.
Wednesday 11 July 2018
TRUMP VISIT:DAY THREE
Sighting. Albeit on the news slagging off NATO which, personally, I find INCREDIBLY helpful in a meaningful dialogue. You giant head of ego. Seriously, you should see someone.
You use the word "egregious" a lot. I would like, may I, to request one thing. Can you explain the definition of egregious? Or, for that matter. "delinquent"?
I suspect not somehow, but I will eat my hat if you are able to do it without an advisor stood next to you with a dictionary and a thesaurus whispering in your ear.
International relations is not easy. Okay. so I may have wagged all my International Relations classes when I was 17, but I'm not the Pres. I found it boring. Trade, trade, trade, tax, blah blah blah. I know it's SUPER important, please don't get me wrong, but at 17, when a big wide world is opening up to you, you just want to take a fake ID and hang out watching your favourite bands. I still got As on my exams. Doubt SillyHead would.
Friends, it's been difficult day. England have gone out. I was more upset about Australia but there you go. We must show solidarity and that we will not let women be subjugated by this sex pest (quote: BBC Panorama - can't sue). I shall enjoy the blimp as it flies itself. God, there are some LOLs there no?
Safe passage into the night all.
You use the word "egregious" a lot. I would like, may I, to request one thing. Can you explain the definition of egregious? Or, for that matter. "delinquent"?
I suspect not somehow, but I will eat my hat if you are able to do it without an advisor stood next to you with a dictionary and a thesaurus whispering in your ear.
International relations is not easy. Okay. so I may have wagged all my International Relations classes when I was 17, but I'm not the Pres. I found it boring. Trade, trade, trade, tax, blah blah blah. I know it's SUPER important, please don't get me wrong, but at 17, when a big wide world is opening up to you, you just want to take a fake ID and hang out watching your favourite bands. I still got As on my exams. Doubt SillyHead would.
Friends, it's been difficult day. England have gone out. I was more upset about Australia but there you go. We must show solidarity and that we will not let women be subjugated by this sex pest (quote: BBC Panorama - can't sue). I shall enjoy the blimp as it flies itself. God, there are some LOLs there no?
Safe passage into the night all.
Tuesday 10 July 2018
TRUMP WEEK: DAY TWO
No sighting as yet.
Many documentaries watched. Still fairly convinced this dude is not a hot option right now. Anyone seen Obama recently? I feel like he's kinda free right now, and I am super tired of screaming his name in my sleep; similar to Atreyu.
So, slight self-important post. I was lucky enough to be interviewed by the Beyond Bechdel podcast. I know, right? But apparently according to the host I am reasonably entertaining. So I shall leave this link here "just in case" you're bored, or need to listen to an Australian.
Love to all. x
PS. So it would seem I am unable to put a working link on this. Which is what you're disabled and literally smashing keys to hope something is spelled right. Please look at @courtneyishere on Twitter for the URL. Sorry. Must stop saying sorry. Sorry about that.
PPS It's worth it.
Many documentaries watched. Still fairly convinced this dude is not a hot option right now. Anyone seen Obama recently? I feel like he's kinda free right now, and I am super tired of screaming his name in my sleep; similar to Atreyu.
So, slight self-important post. I was lucky enough to be interviewed by the Beyond Bechdel podcast. I know, right? But apparently according to the host I am reasonably entertaining. So I shall leave this link here "just in case" you're bored, or need to listen to an Australian.
Love to all. x
PS. So it would seem I am unable to put a working link on this. Which is what you're disabled and literally smashing keys to hope something is spelled right. Please look at @courtneyishere on Twitter for the URL. Sorry. Must stop saying sorry. Sorry about that.
PPS It's worth it.
Monday 9 July 2018
TRUMP WEEK: IN BRTAAAAAIN
Well, we're all a bit excited aren't we? Goodness me, England is through to the semi-final of the World Cup football tournament and Trumpy is through to Mrs May. Good luck there son.
I shall be covering the Trump visit to Britain over the next few days with my usual caustic wit, and general malaise. Enjoy, as you watch the world go to absolute, fucking ruin; with my hilarious, disease ridden commentary
.
I shall be covering the Trump visit to Britain over the next few days with my usual caustic wit, and general malaise. Enjoy, as you watch the world go to absolute, fucking ruin; with my hilarious, disease ridden commentary
Wednesday 27 June 2018
DEALING WITH THE FACT YOU ARE PROBABLY GOING TO PEG IT
Ugh. Sooky, sooky post. I saw my arms and shoulder in the mirror today for the first time in awhile. I tend to avoid mirrors, due to the "looking like shit all the time" element. And I was incredibly frightened at how thin I look.
I know many people may think of this and be like, oh my God, I would love to be that thin. Someone, a friend, said it to me recently. "Oh my God, I would love to be that thin!". She meant no malice. But she didn't understand that this was through years of malnutrition and inability to absorb anything. The puking up all the time doesn't particularly help either.
It's not cool to comment on people looking ill. This happens to me all the time, because I've lived in the same area for over 10 years and know basically everyone around this place. Because I'm nice. Not because I'm sick. People used to call me fat, when I was on steroids. They certainly aren't doing this now. Now they just tell me I look ill.
I'm also concerned about the way the NHS is treating me. I know they're a marvellous institution, and they care, for effectively no money, but that doesn't explain why I currently get ignored despite having "urgent" marked on all referrals. My next appointment is September. I'll probably, at this rate, be dead by then.
I do my best to get up, do my best, interact. Able bodied people do not quite get how much easier it is for us to just curl up on the sofa, and cry, and sleep. I'm really struggling with this, mainly in my head. Isn't your head THE WORST?
I shall be back on good form shortly I'm sure. I just am currently staring the black dog in the face, along with my normal person issues, paying for taxis no one is asking to pay me back for (I can't walk), and just the loss of a career. I'm clearly just watching some shit TV.
Thanks for reading.
I know many people may think of this and be like, oh my God, I would love to be that thin. Someone, a friend, said it to me recently. "Oh my God, I would love to be that thin!". She meant no malice. But she didn't understand that this was through years of malnutrition and inability to absorb anything. The puking up all the time doesn't particularly help either.
It's not cool to comment on people looking ill. This happens to me all the time, because I've lived in the same area for over 10 years and know basically everyone around this place. Because I'm nice. Not because I'm sick. People used to call me fat, when I was on steroids. They certainly aren't doing this now. Now they just tell me I look ill.
I'm also concerned about the way the NHS is treating me. I know they're a marvellous institution, and they care, for effectively no money, but that doesn't explain why I currently get ignored despite having "urgent" marked on all referrals. My next appointment is September. I'll probably, at this rate, be dead by then.
I do my best to get up, do my best, interact. Able bodied people do not quite get how much easier it is for us to just curl up on the sofa, and cry, and sleep. I'm really struggling with this, mainly in my head. Isn't your head THE WORST?
I shall be back on good form shortly I'm sure. I just am currently staring the black dog in the face, along with my normal person issues, paying for taxis no one is asking to pay me back for (I can't walk), and just the loss of a career. I'm clearly just watching some shit TV.
Thanks for reading.
Monday 11 June 2018
I SHALL NOT GO QUIETLY INTO THE DARK NIGHT
I just watched a YouTube clip of the Daily Show host and correspondents talking about how the show is made, and my heart is full of hope. Why can't a disabled, cranky, tired British woman come and be part of that show? I would kick arse (ass? - trying to acclimatise).
This show is my dream job. Let me rephrase. Dream Job. It combines my two passions; journalism and comedy. Dear Trevor Noah, please see this and know I would move country to a place that is run by my most hated person, has terrible healthcare, and I left many years ago never to return, for the opportunity.
I spent today in "group therapy", to which, again, I was the only person to show up. Not so groupy. I'm not allowed to talk about what goes on but another lady eventually showed. And talking to her, and her situation made me angry at the world. Never mind the fact we are all about to be blown up (one hour before the summit commences), it would appear I am doing a US Election special - ie staying up to watch this shit - because I CARE. I care that the world is going to hell in a handbasket. I care that someone makes sexist and misogynistic remarks at me in public. I care that I have to deal with my own personal physical pain, and absorb everyone else's. It's a thing with an empathic. You just take it on without meaning to. And I certainly care that a grown man in the street called me a "spaz" the other day. Jesus man. It's 2018. Get a better insult you tracksuit pant wearing ingrate.
All I'm saying is it's hard for someone in my position to catch a break. I feel like I try and try and try again, and sometimes someone throws you a bone and it still ends up in the bin. All I want is to be able to do what I know I'm good at, and talented at. Goddammit, Dulce worked in call centres. Snap, mate.
I hate playing the disabled/sick card but that is what is stopping everything, and it's not right. I'm fed up, and I don't want to take it anymore. Someone start paying me for this writing or - well, I'll probably keep doing it anyway.
I'm going to get up on stage and do comedy despite not being able to stand, get up the stairs to the gig room and being fucking shit arsed terrified. But you don't make a Jamie Oliver program without using more than 5 ingredients.*
Trevor, anytime you are ready, I am here mate. I think I would be an asset. And yes, this is begging. Sorry about that.
See you on the other side, peeps. I have a colander on my head. It's airier. And the wok is too heavy.
*gag specifically for my husband.
This show is my dream job. Let me rephrase. Dream Job. It combines my two passions; journalism and comedy. Dear Trevor Noah, please see this and know I would move country to a place that is run by my most hated person, has terrible healthcare, and I left many years ago never to return, for the opportunity.
I spent today in "group therapy", to which, again, I was the only person to show up. Not so groupy. I'm not allowed to talk about what goes on but another lady eventually showed. And talking to her, and her situation made me angry at the world. Never mind the fact we are all about to be blown up (one hour before the summit commences), it would appear I am doing a US Election special - ie staying up to watch this shit - because I CARE. I care that the world is going to hell in a handbasket. I care that someone makes sexist and misogynistic remarks at me in public. I care that I have to deal with my own personal physical pain, and absorb everyone else's. It's a thing with an empathic. You just take it on without meaning to. And I certainly care that a grown man in the street called me a "spaz" the other day. Jesus man. It's 2018. Get a better insult you tracksuit pant wearing ingrate.
All I'm saying is it's hard for someone in my position to catch a break. I feel like I try and try and try again, and sometimes someone throws you a bone and it still ends up in the bin. All I want is to be able to do what I know I'm good at, and talented at. Goddammit, Dulce worked in call centres. Snap, mate.
I hate playing the disabled/sick card but that is what is stopping everything, and it's not right. I'm fed up, and I don't want to take it anymore. Someone start paying me for this writing or - well, I'll probably keep doing it anyway.
I'm going to get up on stage and do comedy despite not being able to stand, get up the stairs to the gig room and being fucking shit arsed terrified. But you don't make a Jamie Oliver program without using more than 5 ingredients.*
Trevor, anytime you are ready, I am here mate. I think I would be an asset. And yes, this is begging. Sorry about that.
See you on the other side, peeps. I have a colander on my head. It's airier. And the wok is too heavy.
*gag specifically for my husband.
Tuesday 15 May 2018
ALLEDGEDLY, WE NOW HITTING NEW HIGHS WITH BEING SIZIST IN OUR CLOTHING
Hello, it's me again, and I'm rather cross.
I have just seen an ITV (ITN) report alleging that plus size women are being charged more for their clothing, than, what magazines and a Hadid who doesn't eat ANYTHING (no lie -broadcast on RHOBH) tell us , is "normal sized".
This makes me so fucking mad. And it makes me mad for the opposite reason. I have severe and debilitating Crohn's disease. That's the one where you shit all the time, yeah? It ain't fun, it ain't glam, and it certainly does not make you plus sized. My intestine it situated outside my body and lives in a bag. IT'S SUPER GLAM.
Unless you meet a little friend called Prednisolone.
Pred is a steroid. Steroid introduce water retention and give you something called Moonface. If you are SM addicts, you probably saw fellow sufferer, Dynamo, recently looking a bit different. I saw that for two seconds and went, "he's really ill. That's Pred."
Don't gawp. I didn't put his picture there for that. It's basic demonstration Oddly I didn't take any pictures of myself in those periods. But I ate a hell of a lot of cheese on toast.
Don't get me wrong. Pred has probably saved my life a few times, physically. It has also destroyed my life, emotionally, many more times. I overheard a friend talking about me in the pub one day, and his words were, "jeez, she's packed it on hasn't she?". I cried for days and never wanted to go back again.
I am now too thin. I do not absorb nutrients, I spent last bank holiday in-patient in hospital, and I seriously thought One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was a fiction. Me and my broken veins can tell you, it ain't. Have a chat with Mr Hunt. I should expect (ha!) he may be across this.
The worst thing that has happened to me in the last while is I've lost the use of ,my legs, fingers, feet. Peripheral neuropathy. Don't even bother, I can't be bothered anymore, but basically it sucks and I walk with a stick. And someone I hadn't seen in years greeted me with "you're so skinny! I wish I could be as skinny as you."
I died a little on the inside at that point, but equally I'm not mad at her at all. People don't know how to react to illness, I have to get to terms with that, because I do get really mad all the time.
Skinny people are no happier that heavier people. Do NOT THINK YOU CAN CHARGE PEOPLE MORE FOR CLOTH, WHICH WE USE TO MAKE OURSELVES FEEL A BIT NICER. FANCIER. PRETTIER. Skinny, underweight people do NOT take "you are so skinny" as a compliment. Lose the prejudice, yeah?
Also I had a full basket, New Look. It's now empty. YOU did that.
I have just seen an ITV (ITN) report alleging that plus size women are being charged more for their clothing, than, what magazines and a Hadid who doesn't eat ANYTHING (no lie -broadcast on RHOBH) tell us , is "normal sized".
This makes me so fucking mad. And it makes me mad for the opposite reason. I have severe and debilitating Crohn's disease. That's the one where you shit all the time, yeah? It ain't fun, it ain't glam, and it certainly does not make you plus sized. My intestine it situated outside my body and lives in a bag. IT'S SUPER GLAM.
Unless you meet a little friend called Prednisolone.
Pred is a steroid. Steroid introduce water retention and give you something called Moonface. If you are SM addicts, you probably saw fellow sufferer, Dynamo, recently looking a bit different. I saw that for two seconds and went, "he's really ill. That's Pred."
Don't gawp. I didn't put his picture there for that. It's basic demonstration Oddly I didn't take any pictures of myself in those periods. But I ate a hell of a lot of cheese on toast.
Don't get me wrong. Pred has probably saved my life a few times, physically. It has also destroyed my life, emotionally, many more times. I overheard a friend talking about me in the pub one day, and his words were, "jeez, she's packed it on hasn't she?". I cried for days and never wanted to go back again.
I am now too thin. I do not absorb nutrients, I spent last bank holiday in-patient in hospital, and I seriously thought One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was a fiction. Me and my broken veins can tell you, it ain't. Have a chat with Mr Hunt. I should expect (ha!) he may be across this.
The worst thing that has happened to me in the last while is I've lost the use of ,my legs, fingers, feet. Peripheral neuropathy. Don't even bother, I can't be bothered anymore, but basically it sucks and I walk with a stick. And someone I hadn't seen in years greeted me with "you're so skinny! I wish I could be as skinny as you."
I died a little on the inside at that point, but equally I'm not mad at her at all. People don't know how to react to illness, I have to get to terms with that, because I do get really mad all the time.
Skinny people are no happier that heavier people. Do NOT THINK YOU CAN CHARGE PEOPLE MORE FOR CLOTH, WHICH WE USE TO MAKE OURSELVES FEEL A BIT NICER. FANCIER. PRETTIER. Skinny, underweight people do NOT take "you are so skinny" as a compliment. Lose the prejudice, yeah?
Also I had a full basket, New Look. It's now empty. YOU did that.
Tuesday 8 May 2018
DON'T DRAG ME INTO YOUR HOT MESS
So, good old POTUS has done the expected, and listened to no one, except the two or three hirings (firing date TBC), who are blowing smoke up his arse. By doing this, he is putting the entire world at significant risk.
The speech he delivered, poorly, regarding pulling out of the Iran deal was pathetic. There was absolutely no foreign policy included, but a hell of a lot of "bads", "poor deals", and general grandstanding. You may be the POTUS, kiddo, but at the end of the day you are a shadow of what the office holds dear. You know what a lot of people appreciate in a leader? Well-rounded intelligence. Thoughtful consideration. Truthfulness. And you have the absolute bare faced cheek to talk about "cheating" on a deal. Marriage is a deal, Donny. How you getting on with that deal? Yeah. Thought so. You got off lightly on $130k. According to good old Guiliani. ("Such a fine lawyer".)
I am furious that this one megalomaniac is dragging us into a world that I thought I was lucky enough to leave behind as a child with the Iraq war. The night vision images of bombings during that period still give me nightmares. I used to stare up at the sky and wonder if that plane going overhead was going to bomb us. This is how a 12 year old thinks. What about the 12 year olds now, Trump? How do you think your teenager is going to feel about the fact you are plunging us headfirst into the unknown yet again, for your personal gain?
You really think North Korea are going to drop everything and play nice? You used to be The Apprentice guy. Even you must know better than that. But you don't, because it's all about THE IMAGE and THE ART OF THE DEAL. Which you didn't write, just as an aside. I suspect you probably didn't even read it.
So, tremendous work Donny. And before you think about getting your goons on me, I'm an American citizen so I say what the fuck I like. First Amendment, yeah? The one before you can all have guns. How you getting on with your NRA mates? Bet they're loving this rhetoric. Although, in fairness, that word is tricky to spell so, you know.
The speech he delivered, poorly, regarding pulling out of the Iran deal was pathetic. There was absolutely no foreign policy included, but a hell of a lot of "bads", "poor deals", and general grandstanding. You may be the POTUS, kiddo, but at the end of the day you are a shadow of what the office holds dear. You know what a lot of people appreciate in a leader? Well-rounded intelligence. Thoughtful consideration. Truthfulness. And you have the absolute bare faced cheek to talk about "cheating" on a deal. Marriage is a deal, Donny. How you getting on with that deal? Yeah. Thought so. You got off lightly on $130k. According to good old Guiliani. ("Such a fine lawyer".)
I am furious that this one megalomaniac is dragging us into a world that I thought I was lucky enough to leave behind as a child with the Iraq war. The night vision images of bombings during that period still give me nightmares. I used to stare up at the sky and wonder if that plane going overhead was going to bomb us. This is how a 12 year old thinks. What about the 12 year olds now, Trump? How do you think your teenager is going to feel about the fact you are plunging us headfirst into the unknown yet again, for your personal gain?
You really think North Korea are going to drop everything and play nice? You used to be The Apprentice guy. Even you must know better than that. But you don't, because it's all about THE IMAGE and THE ART OF THE DEAL. Which you didn't write, just as an aside. I suspect you probably didn't even read it.
So, tremendous work Donny. And before you think about getting your goons on me, I'm an American citizen so I say what the fuck I like. First Amendment, yeah? The one before you can all have guns. How you getting on with your NRA mates? Bet they're loving this rhetoric. Although, in fairness, that word is tricky to spell so, you know.
Monday 30 April 2018
WHY MICHELLE WOLF IS DOING THE JOB SHE WAS HIRED FOR AND YOU NEED TO STFU
So if you don't like comedians, don't fucking hire them. For a comedy roast. You morons.
There are so many double standards going on here. May I set some out:
1. Trump grabs pussies, brags about it, potentially sleeps with Russian prostitutes during ALLEGED business deals (ALLEGEDLY), treats his wife like garbage ("I didn't get her so much" - quote), wants to bang his daughter...shall I go on? (THIS IS ALL ALLEGED - oh hang on, isn't the lawyer in jail?)
Cut to...
Sees someone making jokes - jokes people, she is a comedian - and loses his tiny fistful of McDonald's fries all over the floor. HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE THE PEOPLE THE JOKES WERE ABOUT. Allegedly.
2. Piers Morgan continually, and I hope not intentionally, but who knows, insults people on his morning show, ran a campaign to get the longest serving OAP in football out of a job because he thought it was funny, and, well, we've all seen the image Rachel Parris provided on the Mash Report. Oh yes.
Cut to...
Michelle Wolf is a bully and not funny and Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize (puke), blah blah blah, dude it's in the Daily Mail, I don't have enough life left to divert to reading that shit.
Conclusion.
This is a woman thing. These are the same people that go to comedy shows are go, "oh, female comedians aren't funny". These are the same people that punch down for a living. And they seem to enjoy it.
I experienced a lot of this recently. I'm visibly disabled, and a woman, and let me tell you that combo ain't great. People judge before they know anything. But I'm sick of being talked over the top of. I'm sick of my opinions not counting. This is just ridiculous now, and quite frankly I have enough to deal with without your fucking misogyny. And it is live and well, in North London, which frankly surprises me. I truly thought we were slightly more evolved now, and people - I am disappointed in you.
In summary: Michelle, you're a fucking superstar. You did what should have been done for anyone in your position: the job you were hired to do. And, ironically, I recall Hasan Minhaj basically did the same thing last year, at the same event, and not a peep.
Telling?
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